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TitleGetting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples
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Table of Contents
                            Title Page
Table of Contents
Foreword to the Twentieth-Anniversary Edition of Getting the Love You Want
Preface to the 2001 Edition
Introduction to the 1988 Edition
part I - THE UNCONSCIOUS PARTNERSHIP
	1 - THE MYSTERY OF ATTRACTION
		UNRAVELING THE MYSTERY OF ROMANTIC ATTRACTION
		PLUMBING THE DEPTHS OF THE UNCONSCIOUS MIND
		OLD-BRAIN LOGIC
		NO TIME LIKE THE PRESENT
	2 - CHILDHOOD WOUNDS
		ORIGINAL WHOLENESS
		YOU AND I ARE ONE
		THE PERILOUS PILGRIMAGE
		USERS AND ISOLATERS
		THE LOST SELF
		BODY TABOOS
		FORBIDDEN FEELINGS
		TOOLS OF REPRESSION
		THE FALSE SELF
		THE DISOWNED SELF
		PLATO’S ALLEGORY
	3 - YOUR IMAGO
		SEARCH FOR THE LOST SELF
		THE IMAGO
		THE IMAGO AND ROMANTIC LOVE
	4 - ROMANTIC LOVE
		THE CHEMISTRY OF LOVE
		THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE OF LOVE
		A BRIEF INTERLUDE
		FOSTERING AN ILLUSION
		DENIAL
		HOME MOVIES
		ROMANTIC LOVE DEFINED
		PSYCHE AND EROS
	5 - THE POWER STRUGGLE
		WHY HAVE YOU CHANGED?
		A GLIMPSE AT A PAINFUL REALITY
		HOME MOVIES, PART II
		WEAPONS OF LOVE
		STAGES OF THE POWER STRUGGLE
part II - THE CONSCIOUS PARTNERSHIP
	6 - BECOMING CONSCIOUS
		NEW BRAIN-OLD BRAIN MERGER
		BECOMING A LOVER
		THE FEAR OF CHANGE
		THE PROMISED LAND
		WHAT LIES AHEAD
	7 - COMMITMENT
		THE NEED FOR COMMITMENT
		THE COMMITMENT AGREEMENT
		FUSER-ISOLATER DYNAMICS
		NONCATASTROPHIC EXITS
		THE INVISIBLE DIVORCE
		NARROWING YOUR EXITS
		TIL DEATH DO US PART
	8 - CREATING A ZONE OF SAFETY
		INSIGHT AND BEHAVIORAL CHANGE
		CARING BEHAVIORS
		WHY DOES IT WORK?
		THE SURPRISE LIST
		THE FUN LIST
		THE FEAR OF PLEASURE
		INSIGHT AND BEHAVIORAL CHANGE
	9 - INCREASING YOUR KNOWLEDGE OF YOURSELF AND YOUR PARTNER
		HIDDEN SOURCES OF KNOWLEDGE
		UNDERSTANDING YOUR PARTNER’S INNER WORLD
		DENIAL
		THE IMAGO DIALOGUE
		THE THREE STEPS OF THE IMAGO DIALOGUE
		VALIDATION
		ADDING VALIDATION TO MIRRORING
		EMPATHY
		SENDER RESPONSIBILITY
		BUT! ISN’T DIALOGUING WITH YOUR PARTNER TEDIOUS?
		THE IMAGO WORKUP
		THE PARENT-CHILD DIALOGUE
	10 - DEFINING YOUR CURRICULUM
		WHY SELF-LOVE DOESN’T WORK
		THE LIMITS OF FRIENDSHIP
		TURNING THE THEORY INTO PRACTICE
		DEFINING THE CURRICULUM
		COMPLEX CHANGE SET IN MOTION
		REWARDS AND RESISTANCE
		RESISTANCE
		AGAPE
	11 - CREATING A SACRED SPACE
		MY STORY
		AN EXERCISE THAT FAILED
		WHY ANGER BREEDS ANGER
		THE HOLDING EXERCISE
		REMOVING ALL NEGATIVITY
		WHAT IS NEGATIVITY?
		COLD TURKEY
		SAM AND AMELIA
		CORE SCENE REVISION
		POSITIVE FLOODING
	12 - PORTRAIT OF TWO RELATIONSHIPS
		INTEGRATION
		ANNE AND GREG
		KENNETH AND GRACE
part III - THE EXERCISES
	13 - TEN STEPS TOWARD A CONSCIOUS PARTNERSHIP
		DOING THE EXERCISES
		EXERCISE 1: YOUR RELATIONSHIP VISION
		EXERCISE 2: CHILDHOOD WOUNDS
		EXERCISE 3: IMAGO WORKUP
		EXERCISE 4: CHILDHOOD FRUSTRATIONS
		EXERCISE 5: PARENT-CHILD DIALOGUE
		EXERCISE 6: PARTNER PROFILE
		EXERCISE 7: UNFINISHED BUSINESS
		EXERCISE 8: THE IMAGO DIALOGUE
		EXERCISE 9: THE COMMITMENT DECISION
		EXERCISE 10: REROMANTICIZING
		EXERCISE 11: THE SURPRISE LIST
		EXERCISE 12: THE FUN LIST
		EXERCISE 13: POSITIVE FLOODING
		EXERCISE 14: THE BEHAVIOR CHANGE REQUEST DIALOGUE
		EXERCISE 15: THE HOLDING EXERCISE
		EXERCISE 16: OWNING AND ELIMINATING YOUR NEGATIVITY
		EXERCISE 17: SELF-INTEGRATION
		EXERCISE 18: VISUALIZATION OF LOVE
Acknowledgments
In Appreciation of Jo Robinson
GETTING THE
ALSO BY HARVILLE HENDRIX
Seeking Professional Help
Notes
Bibliography
About Imago Relationship Therapy
Imago Contacts
Meetings with Harville - Living a Life of Dialogue
Index
About the Authors
Copyright Page
                        

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