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TitleTo Be a Man: A Guide to True Masculine Power
File Size1.6 MB
Total Pages269
Table of Contents
Introduction: True Masculine Power
	Softening Does Not Necessarily Mean Emasculation
	Shame Left Unattended Is Shame That Runs Us
	Shame, Aggression, and Sex
	Toward True Masculine Power
Part I: Orientation and Groundwork
	Chapter 1: Tarzan Must Also Weep: Manhood ReEnvisioned
		Longing to Belong
		When Power Gets Derailed
		Sex as an Initiation into Manhood
		Neither Rejecting nor Succumbing to the Dark Side of Male Power
	Chapter 2: Navigational Pointers: Things to Consider for the Journey
		Emotional Literacy
		Turning toward Your Pain
		Distinguishing between Anger and Aggression
		Distinguishing Thought from Feeling
		There’s More to Sex than Meets the Eye
		Connecting the Dots between Your Past and Present
	Chapter 3: Working with Shame: From Humiliation to Humility
		Signs That Shame Is Present
		Healthy and Unhealthy Expressions of Shame
		Getting Better Acquainted with Your Shame
		Shame and Performance
		Shame and Aggression
		Disempowering Your Inner Critic
		How to Work with Your Shame
	Chapter 4: Bringing Your Shadow Out of the Dark: Facing What You’ve Disowned in Yourself
		Facing Your Shadow
		Practice: Getting More Familiar with Your Shadow
		Cultivating Intimacy with Your Shadow
	Chapter 5: The Gift of Challenge: An Edge That Can Bring Out Your Best
		Being at Your Edge
		Cutting through Your Illusions
		Challenge as a Relational Practice
Part II: Power and the Modern Man: Anger, Aggression, and the Hero
	Chapter 6: Fighting for Power: From Overpowering to Empowering
		Fight Club: Meeting Masculinity in the Bare-Knuckled Raw
		A Deeper Empowerment
	Chapter 7: Anger: Tending the Fire
		Anger and Aggression Are Not the Same Thing!
		Shifting from Aggression to Healthy Anger
		Reactive Anger
		Being Vulnerable in Your Anger
		Four Approaches to Working with Anger
		Practice: Anger-In, Anger-Out, Mindfully Held Anger, and Heart-Anger
	Chapter 8: Aggression Unveiled: When You Shift into Attack Mode
		Aggression as Instinct
		Aggression as Social Construction
		The Many Faces of Aggression
		Antidotes to Aggression
		An Integrative View of Aggression
	Chapter 9: Violence: The Brass Knuckles of Aggression
		A History of Violence
		How We Relate to Our Violence
		The Many Faces of War
		Working with Violence
	Chapter 10: The Hero: Courage, Pride, and Embodying Your Natural Heroism
		Heroism in Avatar: A Full-Blooded Awakening
		Courage: Having the Heart to Persist Regardless of Your Fear
		Keeping a Compassionate Eye on Your Pride
		The Presence and Evolution of the Hero
		The Anti-Hero
		The Hero as Human
Part III: Relational Intimacy
	Chapter 11: Clearing the Relationship Hurdle: Some Preparatory Considerations
		The Vulnerability and Challenges of Relating
	Chapter 12: Relational Intimacy for Men: Relationship as a Sanctuary for Transforming Your Life
		Essential Steps to Authentic Intimacy
	Chapter 13: Deep Communication: When Dynamic Receptivity and Expression Work Together
		The Way Back to Connection
		Deep Listening
	Chapter 14: Fighting for the Relationship: Transitioning to Shared Power
	Chapter 15: What Women Need from Men: An Invitation to Be a Full Partner
	Chapter 16: Gay Men: Outsiders No Longer
	Chapter 17: Deep Connection: Foundational Practices for Intimate Relationship
Part IV: Sex
	Chapter 18: Eros Illuminated: An Introductory Look at Sexuality
	Chapter 19: Sex Uncovered: Freeing Your Sexuality from the Obligation to Make You Feel Better
		The Selling of Sex
		The Language of Sex
		Bringing Sex Out of the Closet
	Chapter 20: Eroticitis: Obsessive or Compulsive Interest in Sexual Activity and Possibility
		Eroticitis and Sexual Excitation
		Sex without Eroticitis
	Chapter 21: Eroticizing Our Wounds: Acting Out Old Hurt through Sexual Channels
		Why the Eroticizing of Our Wounds Gets Little Recognition
		How the Eroticizing of Our Unresolved Hurt Happens
		What Our Sexual Fantasies Dramatize
	Chapter 22: Pornography Unplugged: Understanding and Outgrowing Porn
		Pornography Illuminated
		The Price of Being Possessed by a Pornographic Mindset
		Facing the Pain That Drives Us toward Pornography
		Outgrowing Pornography
	Chapter 23: Taking Charge of Your Charge: Responsibility and Sexual Arousal
	Chapter 24: The Penis: A Sensitive Topic
	Chapter 25: Breasts: Mammary Mania
		How the Original Appeal of Breasts Gets Eroticized
		When Breast Fantasies Are Stripped of Their Eroticism
		Moving beyond Breast Fixation
	Chapter 26: Fully Facing Rape
		Do All Men Have an Inner Rapist?
		The Issue of Consent
		Cutting the Ties to Rape
	Chapter 27: Ecstatic Intimacy in the Raw: Awakened Sex
Part V: Wrapping Up
	Chapter 28: Full-Spectrum Healing: Bringing Together All That You Are
		When Your Past Occupies Your Present
		Integrating Body, Mind, Emotion, Psyche, and Spirituality
		Embodying Wholeness
	Chapter 29: The Passage to Authentic Manhood: Your Flaws No Longer in the Way
Appendix: Having a Conscious Rant
About the Author
Further Reading from Robert Augustus Masters
About Sounds True

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